Post by Nicole on May 14, 2005 10:28:00 GMT -5
In my heart I feel bonded to you very deeply. I am sorry for being disrespectful and turning off my computer but I was very afraid that if I didn't get there they would start making decisions about my mom (and she may be Mike's mom but I met her before I met him).
------------ Regarding you and I:--------------
I wouldn't ever disapear for that amount of time on purpose just to hurt you.
You are very important to me.
If you think that for one moment that I would give you up for something
little, or upsetting. Something frustrating, hurtful, or that can be fixed with just
a few words of explanation, apology, or proper changes you are wrong. I wouldn't
give you up for something petty.
I wouldn't intentionally try to harm you or hurt your feelings. I often times
do not think clearly when I speak or when I am upset. I don't think rational
when something happens. When you are a part of my family I will protect and love
that person with my life. Including her. She is very special.
Now I don't really think that you thought for sure that I was trying to upset you or
hurt you on purpose, because if you did you really should have wrote me a nasty email.
I don't feel like things have been improper with us completely as you feel they have
I feel that we have both been working very hard at our problems with bitching and moaning.
I feel better than I have ever felt with you. Even through the recent bitching and moaning
because it really hasn't been all that bad. The communication is there.
I feel important to you. Like somehow you have made me feel that I am very important.
I still have my doubts, my hurts, my fears, but it is just not going to change unless I spend some time with you. Its not something I am trying to live off of. I am not trying to make them an excuse for shitty behaviors. I just have them and am trying very hard to be a non asshole when I feel like something stupid or petty is bothering me. Its called picking your battles. I do not want to battle with you because you make me feel like I am on top of the world.
I understand that you were not feeling very great, and that all this E shit has sucked recently,
but I also understand and see that we are doing very well. I don't think we are moving down a hill. Rather I feel like we are climbing a very steep hill. I feel more secure with you than I have ever felt.
I don't know how much more that I can say to you. Just, that I dont' think things are bad.
I think they are great.
Maybe you are so worried that I am going to be upset you are not enjoying yourself like I am.
I don't know. Its alot of stress what you are going through on E, and with Uni. I wish very much I could take your hand and kiss the tips of your fingers to just hold them next to my lips for a moment. Just to feel the skin against them...
Not in a sexual sense.
Just to feel it.
Love me
------------ Regarding you and I:--------------
I wouldn't ever disapear for that amount of time on purpose just to hurt you.
You are very important to me.
If you think that for one moment that I would give you up for something
little, or upsetting. Something frustrating, hurtful, or that can be fixed with just
a few words of explanation, apology, or proper changes you are wrong. I wouldn't
give you up for something petty.
I wouldn't intentionally try to harm you or hurt your feelings. I often times
do not think clearly when I speak or when I am upset. I don't think rational
when something happens. When you are a part of my family I will protect and love
that person with my life. Including her. She is very special.
Now I don't really think that you thought for sure that I was trying to upset you or
hurt you on purpose, because if you did you really should have wrote me a nasty email.
I don't feel like things have been improper with us completely as you feel they have
I feel that we have both been working very hard at our problems with bitching and moaning.
I feel better than I have ever felt with you. Even through the recent bitching and moaning
because it really hasn't been all that bad. The communication is there.
I feel important to you. Like somehow you have made me feel that I am very important.
I still have my doubts, my hurts, my fears, but it is just not going to change unless I spend some time with you. Its not something I am trying to live off of. I am not trying to make them an excuse for shitty behaviors. I just have them and am trying very hard to be a non asshole when I feel like something stupid or petty is bothering me. Its called picking your battles. I do not want to battle with you because you make me feel like I am on top of the world.
I understand that you were not feeling very great, and that all this E shit has sucked recently,
but I also understand and see that we are doing very well. I don't think we are moving down a hill. Rather I feel like we are climbing a very steep hill. I feel more secure with you than I have ever felt.
I don't know how much more that I can say to you. Just, that I dont' think things are bad.
I think they are great.
Maybe you are so worried that I am going to be upset you are not enjoying yourself like I am.
I don't know. Its alot of stress what you are going through on E, and with Uni. I wish very much I could take your hand and kiss the tips of your fingers to just hold them next to my lips for a moment. Just to feel the skin against them...
Not in a sexual sense.
Just to feel it.
Love me