A million thoughts race through my mind
watching your face as you turn back time
Ancient history deep in your eyes
reminds me of what once was mine
and when you speak it's like a song
that's painful when all said and done
For you, speaking may seem so simple
but beyond your voice, I watch your dimples
move graceful as a weeping willow
as if the past is but a mere pillow
Each strand of hair sitting flat on your head
reminds me the time you walked me home and said,
"I love you as if you are my own.
You'll always be welcome in my home.
Even if you and he break apart,
there is always space for you in my heart."
Years have flown and memory fades
I wish that I were less afraid
to open up about what matters,
why I'm here and all that chatter
I'm angry because I don't know what to call you
I wish it were "Mom" because you are of that value
I promise I wanted to marry your son
I don't know what else I could have done
to stop him from leaving me out in the sun
and creating what I have now become
There's a hole inside me I cannot fill
The absence of time has been a battle uphill
A large part of me feels extremely ashamed
that I wasn't enough to take his last name
Maybe you look at me and see a little girl
but all I see is a torn up world
My lifelong goal, I hit and I missed
and it makes me feel like I'm stuck in a ditch